so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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