I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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