I'd wear matching sweaters with you
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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