I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize