Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
