I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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