Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize
