hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize