i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
