he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
