dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize