I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
