She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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