sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
