i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
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