I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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