just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
