No awkward lesbian experiences without me
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
