I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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