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That's how twitter works, right?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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