I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
