i think my mom watched the whole time
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
This is the high leading the old right now
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Randomize
