You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
