I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
