so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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