So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
