I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize