theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
