When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
