it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Randomize