so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Randomize
