Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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