so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
