do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
