You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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