brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
