Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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