So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Randomize
