Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize