I want to walk on stilts...naked
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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