The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize