i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Maybe he injected his testicle?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
