I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
