lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
