I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
