If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
