Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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