You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
