if you like me you must not know who I am
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
