Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
