It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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